Exhaustion During Pregnancy
Posted by Kalen on Tuesday, April 5, 2011. Filed under: complaining, Pregnancy, pregnancy symptoms
I am a tired girl.
The truth is, I've sat down to write a few times but I feel like my story is redundant right now. First trimesters are not kind to me, and I am not fond of them in return. Though I know it's a common sentiment that I should "count my blessings" and "realize how lucky I am" and "just be thankful" - that's hard to do when you feel like you're constantly motion sick, bloated to the brink of explosion, swallowing huge amounts of excess saliva (yup, it's one of my favorite symptoms), and trying to find even one food that sounds appetizing and has some type of nutritional content in it.
I'm tired of having to be careful about complaining, to avoid hurt feelings. It's hard to not complain when you feel like your life has been hijacked. It's just hard. And women should be "allowed" to be upset, confused, anxious, and sick (even though they're also blessed, lucky, and thankful).
So my days have been spent mustering up energy to maintain some normalcy amidst my zero energy curse. Then Everly and I came down with colds and I was sure the universe had turned against me, because you know... everything is a catastrophe right now (another great emotional symptom).
I can barely change Everly's diapers. I can't do the dishes because of the smell. I am having trouble cleaning the house because I feel faint and dizzy within seconds. And food is disgusting right now. Just about all food. My belly is already showing, and though it's cute and I knew I would pop much earlier since it was my 2nd pregnancy and so close to my 1st, I'd be lying if I didn't say I am worried at how large I could possibly be by 30+ weeks. Ahhhhhhh.
Yeah. That's me. At a little over 9 weeks. Oddly I've lost 3lbs?
Audible moaning. Me rolling around on the ground.
The stretchmarks on my side are the only ones I got with Everly, by the way. Please let that be the case w/ this little buddy too? If you do I will give you free cupcakes?
No? No bargaining? Ok.
(Who am I talking to?)
So yes. I'm in the phase where I feel negative and overwhelmed. I know there is light at the end of the tunnel. I very well remember how happy I became in my 2nd trimester. But getting there is bumpy, and it makes me feel quiet and withdrawn and lonely and like a big baby. And this time I can't be as dependent because I'm a BIG GIRL NOW! and it's crap. I like being juvenile and wollering in misery.
It's all very dramatic, friends.
April 5, 2011 at 5:36 AM
*pet*
I know nothing anyone says can make you feel better right now. But I am so proud of you.
Let's complain together. Who cares.
April 5, 2011 at 5:53 AM
This is why I dread the idea of getting pregnant. I am 99% sure that the experience will be miserable.
I know it's a little early but do you think this will be your last pregnancy?
April 5, 2011 at 6:02 AM
Jackie - we have talked about this. Probably. We like the idea of adopting possibly in the future (years from now) but right now I just can't really see another pregnancy. And some women LOVE pregnancy - seriously. I didn't mind it in the late 2nd/early 3rd trimesters. I felt very normal, energized, and beautiful. But I'd be lying if I didn't say that for some, the experience is more negative. Especially those that get even sicker, have physical complications, etc.
It's a risk but one that is VERY MUCH worth taking when you're ready. :) Even twice in a row obviously! haha
April 5, 2011 at 6:16 AM
I feel you girl and you do have every right to feel that way! I lost about 5lbs or so during my first trimester and had morning sickness twice a day up until week 16. Hang in there! My second trimester was the best and now that I'm in my third trimester I am just so ready for our daughter to be here and am tired of being pregnant and swollen, not being able to sleep well and hot all the time!
April 5, 2011 at 7:16 AM
i know a woman who suffers from hyper-emesis (which literally means exessive vomiting) during here ENTIRE pregnancy, EVERY pregnancy...with her second to last pregnancy she almost died, then at 25/26 weeks, delivered her still-born son into her own hands while trying to get on a stretcher at the hospital. THEN she did it again (got pregnant)...she now has three beautiful children (2 girls and one boy), but has taken permanent measures (her husband did the snip-snip)to not have to go through that ever again...poor girl, i hope you feel better soon!! <3
April 5, 2011 at 7:38 AM
Complain away, if my body had been high jacked, I would do the same. You are in one of the hardest parts, but hopefully you get relief soon!
Me come clean your house for you. ;)text anytime!
April 5, 2011 at 7:43 AM
If I lived near you I would come over and let the babies play while you relaxed. I obviously can't do this. Everly and the half are so lucky to have such a great mom. There is a light at the end of this tunnel.
Love,
Ali
April 5, 2011 at 9:13 AM
lookin good, girl! hang in there and DON'T feel bad about complaining. i honestly wasn't even excited a little bit for a long long time, i felt so sh*tty.
here's to finding some food that sounds good...we've got that struggle over here for other reasons. it's hard, dude. grapes? :/
April 6, 2011 at 6:03 AM
Reading this, I started crying because OMG I FEEL YOU. I have NO energy, all day sickness (no vomiting), and just feel utterly like poo right now. And even though this is my first, I look like I'm about 6 months pregnant right now from the bloating *WAHHHHH!!!!*
I can has the 2nd trimester now, please?
Got home from Nashville last night, started catching up on some things around the apartment about an hour ago and I'm seriously ready for a nap. Supposed to go get some blood work done for my OB/GYN office, but just don't have the energy to do so. Maybe tomorrow.
April 7, 2011 at 2:50 AM
wish i could bake you some cookies and treat you to a pedicure!! proud of you mama!! hopefully this time will pass quickly. :) love the bump. <3
April 13, 2011 at 12:44 AM
You can complain to me anytime! I have 3 and had the same first trimester each time-miserable! It is even harder when you have a little one demanding your attention. Try to enjoy the fresh air of spring and drink lots. Sometimes we forget how much fluid we need.Hang in there